Alter Egos

My boyfriend has many alter-egos and I've named them all based on their personalities. Perhaps over time, I will learn more!


David: This is his normal name. He is David on any given day when he's out running errands, spending time with me and friends, or at work. David is intelligent, has a good sense of humor, generous to his friends and family, and is one of the most helpful, thoughtful guys you'll meet. A car was stalled on the side of the road once and he walked over to see if they needed anything and another time he helped a friend move across the country.

Davy: This is the nickname that he is known by in his family. Actually, it's the name he was always known as until college when he started to go by David instead. I call him David because that's what he went by when I met him. From what I've seen, Davy has a great relationship with his family and it's cute to see him play with his little niece.

Poet: I've sometimes referred to him as my poet, sometimes my drunken poet, when he sends me poetic texts (often at 2am). I've mostly stopped receiving late-night texts because I'm either out with him late at night or he knows I'm at home asleep and he will see me the next day. But here's a few examples of what he's sent me in the past:

“I do so love your mannerisms, rolling, blinking eyes, smiles and laughs with toss of head.”

“Words fail you. Literature falls short of doing you justice.”

“Ain't you so sweet and mellow and pale white all like snow, but not snow white with her dwarves or dwarfs or however it’s spelled.”

Drunky McDrunkerton: This is his drunken alter-ego. This almost Irish-sounding name fits his good-hearted, drunken charm. Drunky McDrunkerton comes out after he's had a few whiskey sours. He talks a bit louder, he gestures more, and he will get into debates with someone about anything from the latest news to history. He likes history. (To be fair, he could get into a debate at any time, but when we're out at night, he has people to debate with.) He will squeeze my hand or knee and I love it when he twirls my hair. He also starts texting people random thoughts. His closest friends are all on Dave's Drunken Subscription. This alter-ego has fun and will from time to time sing karaoke.

Drunky McGroper: This rather unsavory character is unleashed when David has had WAY too many. Raunchy jokes and an awkward sense of humor are his repertoire. He sways a bit, he sees double, and he gropes a bit. Don't worry, it's not some poor unsuspecting person at our table; just me. I must admit, I worry when I see Drunky McGroper. Thankfully I'm usually the designated driver. And luckily, I do not see this alter-ego much at all. I think it's only been twice since I met him.

Davy Jones: This is Dave when he's in a goofy mood. (Hence the reference to the goofy Monkees character.) He's got boyish charm and I always laugh when Davy J. comes out to play. Goofing with Davy J. isn't unlike playing with a child as he hides under the covers to disappear. And something about trying to tickle him drives me wild. (Probably because he's not easy to tickle and when I find that vulnerable spot, I pounce!)

Handsome Brown-Eyed Man: This is his super sweet boyfriend side. HBEM is very much like the characteristics of David, only mainly directed at me. :) He likes to take care of me, he wants to know that I'm happy (and I am), and is all-in-all a great guy.


So there you have it; the many alter-egos of my boyfriend.